Hi, hello! Feeling anxious? Same. I actually didn’t realize how much anxiety actually seeped into my mindset and my every day until like everyone else in the world, my life was forced to a grinding halt to only proceed into a slow crawl. I’ve been trying to find the good in all of this. I actually think a lot of good has come from this. Just a basic level, we’ve all been gifted time. What a rare gift to get! Before this, I was constantly on the move just trying to doggy swim faster to keep my head above the water. I knew I had some issues with anxiety but was too busy and nose down to realize exactly how that manifested or how I could regain control. I was living in the past having anxiety over situations no longer in my control or I was hustlin’ so hard for the future that wasn’t yet here.
Before all of this started, I went to an event that Create and Cultivate put on: Polka Dot Summit. It was a free event, Minnie Mouse themed and now come to think of it, one of the last big events I attended. One of the speakers was Dr. Deepika Chopra. She’s known for “evidence-based manifestation” and for being the “optimism doctor”. During her talk, she discussed BEING MINDFUL IN THE PRESENT. She used the example of eating an orange. Instead of going on autopilot, think about how the orange feels in your hand. How vibrant the color is. How each piece pops with flavor. The smell of orange while you’re peeling it, eating it, and that lingers after it’s gone.
Obviously, we can’t do this for everything. But I sometimes find that my wheels are spinning and simultaneously, I’m going nowhere fast. I stop. I take a few deep breaths. And I use this exercise. Right after the talk, we were all given cotton candy. I couldn’t remember the last time I found this sticky, delicious treat in my hands. I smelled the strawberry flavor. I felt the texture. I saw the bright pink color cloud of yummy. I could feel my anxiety dropping. I knew this was a tool I could always implement.
Little did I know, I would be using it much more frequently and on a very different scale. Covid hits. Quarantine is enforced. And all my carefully laid out plans for the future whether it was dinner next week or a big move in the next few years – shattered. I’m not going to lie – it’s been hard for me. I am such a planner. So being put in a situation where not only could I not count on my plans, I couldn’t make any new ones. Only two things have saved me. FAITH and STAYING PRESENT. Which really can be one in the same.
God has it. Period. No ifs ands or buts. It’s easy to forget that when I can create plans and fulfill them “on my own”. When that is stripped away, what am I left with? The present moment and faith that God will take care of it. This pandemic is tragic and devastating. I’ve had to find where the good is. No family is immune to the effects of this pandemic. You have to find light in the darkness. When I find myself getting anxious about things entirely out my control, I try to evoke the “be present method”. I take a few deep breaths and I look around. I see Scout first usually. Extra time with Scout while I’m still working is a blessing. I see my surroundings. I’m currently at my parent’s house in Colorado. Bonus time with my family, a summer in Colorado which I haven’t had in 6 years. I smell the pine trees. I see Scout. I feel the familiar furniture I grew up with. I taste my mom’s cooking. I force myself into gratitude, faith, and the present moment.
This, here, right now. That is what we can control. We can control how we react and our attitudes. The list ends there. But once we bring ourselves back to the present moment, trust God with the future, and move from the past, is when our anxiety no longer has a hold and we are free.
Please tell me – how are you feeling? Can I be praying for you? Let me know either in the comments below or DM me on Instagram. Either way, we’re in this together.
With so much love and gratitude (and less anxiety),